The Swan Lake Ballet

The Swan Lake Ballet in an Instagram advertisement was posted for a while,  2/7/2026, one night only in Kingston. I would like to take my husband with me this time to see the performance on stage, just like when we were in Taiwan. I thought it might bring back some memories for him. Back then he always made an effort to buy any ticket for a famous classical music concert that would come to Taiwan; like piano, ballet, violin and symphony orchestra … we enjoyed it very much together! Once he said he would pluck the stars from the sky for me; if I wanted it so, that’s how much he loved and spoiled me! Oh, I love him and miss his former self so much! 

Feeling Melancholy

It’s icy and snowy conditions in the winter here, there’s no Ikebana class these three months and with all these love letters, I have felt trapped, saddened and emotionally vulnerable, there’s no joy in life anymore! I think I might have been suffering depression for a while! I miss my husband’s love, although I get a lot of my children’s love and support.

From 1963 to 1968, back then there were no computers, no iPhones, the telephone was not popular either, the only way for our communication was through letters back and forth. I was his first love and love at the first sight!   He was a practical, realistic, scientific, hard working and strong young man, and I was totally different from him, I was artistic, loved literature and classical music, spoiled, financially free and fragile young lady. It’s hard for two people with such different personalities to spark chemistry. But he said it’s totally fine and we could be complementary for each other, perfectly! For all those years I was moved by his patience and persistent love. I gradually fell in love with him. Finally, I realized he was the truest person I could rely on for a husband. Besides, my parents loved him too, they knew he was the one that he would take good care of their beloved daughter, protect her and be trusted. We always spent more time apart than together, rarely seeing each other (a year of military service and busy young surgeon in residence’s schedule) before we tied the knot. But this didn’t affect our love at all, our steadfast love is pure and lasts forever! 

March 31, 2026, will be our 58 years anniversary. I truly miss my husband, I need his love back, he’s not the same person he used to be since he has this terrible disease dementia. He still calls me Reiko (玲子), he still is a very pleasant, gentle old man, capable to do most of things physically, but mentally confused …I am not young anymore. I feel no future and very sad. Every time I reread his love letters, suddenly I feel like I am back in my youth, a pretty lovely young lady again, I was so loved and spoiled by him! It really has comforted me. 

Hopefully spring is not so far away 

Falling in Love Again

My daughter found those letters in the shoe box during the period of moving process. Altogether, more than two hundred love letters from my husband, written six decades ago. They covered from his young age as a medical student, in internship, after graduating from medical school, then a year of military service (in Taiwan this was a must) then becoming a young doctor, for all those five, six years of a long love journey until our marriage. I was engaged in June 1966 (right before he left for military service), a 22 years old, a music teacher at junior high school in my hometown Kwansi. A beautiful, charming and elegant young lady (by then everyone said that I was).  I feel so sad and heartbroken that why I didn’t discover all these letters sooner, when he was still healthy and didn’t have dementia. Now it’s too late, he has forgotten how deeply he once loved me, and now we can’t share happiness, anger, sadness and joy (喜怒哀樂) together anymore! Deep down I know he still loves me dearly! His everlasting love for me and his passion for medicine, his kindness and caring ……My heart aches every time I read his letters, I can’t help my tears just running down! 

It just dawned on me that why all the letters appeared again, allowing me to reflect back to the scene gradually. It’s God’s will to tell me that right now, what to do? I was so touched when I read all his love letters, I just felt like I am falling in love with him again! I would try to do the same, pay attention to him with more love, support and care. 

Two individuals become one arrangement 

Red rose and carnation 

Holiday Arrangement using Glass Container

It’s been a long while since I had posted an arrangement for Christmas holiday.  For the entire month I just had no desire to do any Ikekana. I think I suffered a deep depression! (I might talk about it later).  We have been moving here for more than two months now. It’s been so cold! We had 15 inches of snow the other day and then we got 34 inches of snow on yesterday (1/25/2026). It’s a historic winter snow storm across the region. Before the day of the snow storm started, my daughter in-law and I went to Kingston area for food shopping and I bought a bouquet of flowers, thinking about making an arrangement finally! (1/27/2026)

Materials: The branches and pine I cut from my yard, the others from part of bouquet. The glass container from class required that I keep it in mind.